Beginners Gods and Goddesses

How to Start Working With a Goddess or God

So you’ve found your god and goddess, but now you’re left wondering what’s next? How do I start a relationship with my god and goddess? Everyone’s relationship with their gods will be different and special. Don’t feel like you have to follow a strict set of rules to work with your god or goddess. Do what you feel is right and true to you. But if you’re still unsure, here’s how to start working with a goddess or god.

How to Start Working With a Pagan Goddess or God (tip: you don’t have to “worship” them!)

You’re new to paganism and recently discovered your god or goddess. Maybe both. While there are many forms of paganism and having a god or goddess in your religious practice isn’t required, for many it comforts and helps them through troubling times. It also gives them a sense of peace knowing their god and goddess are in their corner. Protecting them. Healing them. Working favors for them.

Having a god or goddess in your life is the same as a Christian having Jesus in their lives; however, you don’t have to “worship” pagan deities. More often than not, pagans say they “work with” their gods and goddesses. Your relationship with your god or goddess will feel like a friend or partner, but can also feel like a father or mother too. The old gods and goddesses don’t need us to worship them. They have everything they need and don’t require groveling. Let’s learn how to start working with them instead.

Foreword on Discernment

Don’t be naive and think that every god or goddess has your best benefit in their minds. Like human beings and nature, the gods are complex. They have both light and dark in them. And some a little more dark than others. So be careful who you’re invoking into your space and life. If it feels wrong, if the deity gets “pushy” with offerings or asks to come inside of YOU…you should banish this spirit immediately. Sometimes malevolent spirits will try to trick us into believing they are a deity or even an ancestor. Regular magical protective maintenance also helps to keep these malevolent spirits out of our lives. Truly, it’s about discernment. If it feels wrong, it is wrong. Go with your gut above all else when working with any kind of spirit.

1. Study Your God and Goddess

The first thing to do when you discover your pagan god or goddess is to get to know them through study. Your deities came from somewhere, right? Research what their name means, who venerated them in ancient times, and where their sacred temples were. Keep a special part of your journal and dedicate it to your god or goddess. Write down all you learn about working with your god or goddess in your journal. After you’ve learned the basics, then dive into the deep stuff. This includes the mythology of your god or goddess—don’t forget that they might have been passed down through folklore as heroes, fairies, etc.

All of this seems like basic knowledge, but many people will pick a god or goddess and forget to put in the time to get to know them before calling on them. Would you make a friend with someone but never ask them about themselves? Never get to know their history? Never ask them where they came from or what they do for a living? If you choose to ignore the background of your god or goddess, you aren’t getting to know them on a personal level. And they will be less likely to put the time and effort into getting to know you.

2. Communication: Prayer, Signs and More

When starting to work with a goddess or god, communication is key. You can call it prayer or simply talking. Talk to your god or goddess in your mind or out loud. Either way, they’ll hear you. You don’t have to kneel down or bow your head to pray to your god or goddess. You can literally drive down the road and talk to them—you can talk to them at any time and literally anywhere, and you don’t need a fancy prayer to do it. This is how you can communicate with your god or goddess, but how do they communicate with you?

The Gods Communicate with Signs

In my experience, when you start working with a goddess or pagan god, they will answer your prayers through nature and recurring signs. Maybe you see a large crow following you to work one day. Then you see the same bird the next day. This is a sign that Odin, Bran, Maeve or The Morrigan is answering you. The gods send signs and symbols through nature, random conversations, and mainstream media (TV, radio, online, books, etc), and these signs will keep coming at you until you realize. Recurring signs and symbols are one of the most common ways a god or goddess will talk to you. If you’re not sure you received the sign, ask your goddess or god to send you 2 more clear signs as confirmation.

Divination

Another way to get to know and start working with a goddess or god is through divination. I have dedicated an oracle card deck to my patron god and him only. Every time I use the deck, I’m speaking to him and asking him to teach me his lessons through the cards. Feel free to use any form of divination to communicate with your deity: scrying, pendulum, tarot, or runes. Cleanse your divination tool before use and ask your deity’s energy to charge the tool. Then let your goddess or god know you’re dedicating this tool to communication with them. Learn how to use tarot to honor the gods here.

Dreams

I don’t know about you, but many of my spiritual experiences happen in my dreams. The gods like to visit and talk to us during dream time. It’s often when we are most open to receiving their messages. Begin by keeping a dream journal. Ask your god or goddess to visit you or send you messages in your dreams. Be sure to thank them and record the dreams in your journal.

3. Offerings Are Gifts for the Gods

You are starting to establish a relationship with your god or goddess and you want to show your gratitude. You can do this by giving offerings, similar to tithing in Church (except your god or goddess doesn’t require money from you).

Set up an altar or a small space on a tabletop and leave offerings you feel your god or goddess appreciates. These offerings can be any of the following: food, candlelight, incense, water, beverages, crystals, artwork, crafts, poems, and more! A good practice to develop is to give an offering at least once a week and then build up to once a day. What you’re doing is saying you appreciate your god or goddess as a friend. You are essentially giving them a gift. And guess what? In return, they will give you gifts that could include: protection, love, abundance, healing, guidance, and more. It’s an energy exchange.

Another wonderful thing you’ll notice—the more you give offerings the more you will receive. Eventually, you’ll truly enjoy giving gifts to your god or goddess and they in turn will enjoy showering you with blessings. Keep in mind your offerings don’t have to be expensive—you can burn incense once daily, for example. Or you can provide a bowl of herbs once every other week. You can even give a glass of wine or water as an offering. If you want to give an expensive offering, that is okay too, but not required. The gods also enjoy artwork to honor them, as well as writing poems or songs or dancing for them. It is about your time and effort and intention.

4. Dedication Rituals

Sometimes when learning how to start working with a goddess or god, we might realize this deity isn’t the right one for us. That’s okay! But once you find the right deity, you’ll know it. The relationship will blossom and become something unique and beautiful. Sometimes we want to devote or dedicate our entire lives to one deity. And in this case, we want to show this dedication to our god or goddess. I recommend taking a ritual bath dedicated to your deity with herbs/materials linked to your deity. This becomes a sort of pagan “baptism”. Talk to your deity and tell him/her your intentions with the ritual bath. OR take a trip to a local body of water and baptize yourself in your deity’s name there. Some people may choose to spend the night in a forest, on a mountain, or somewhere that brings them closer to their deity. The choice is yours.

It’s a Beautiful Thing…

As time goes by and you get to know your god or goddess, your relationship will grow and blossom into something truly unique and beautiful. Think of it this way— many of these gods and goddesses have had their names dragged through the dirt for centuries. Many of them have almost been completely forgotten. To hear their name on your lips or see their name in your writing would be flattering, don’t you think? And if someone was to give them an offering of patchouli incense or light a candle in their honor, don’t you think they would appreciate the effort to get to know them and want to get to know you in return?

Want to learn more? Listen to our podcast on Our Pagan Gods:

35 Comments

  1. Anonymous

    November 24, 2021 at 11:26 am

    My deity is Selene. I do not know if she wants to work with me or not. How can I know?

  2. Evelyn

    August 2, 2021 at 11:12 am

    What do I do with the offering? Do I leave it there till its gone, wait a specific amount of time, for example cake or water? I don’t know what to do here.

    1. Katrina

      September 24, 2021 at 6:54 pm

      I asked this question to someone. That person told me I could just pick it up after a few days or after a week. I think it just depends. I would ask your deity what is a good length of time for an offering, maybe only 24 hours… it might depend on what it is. I would think that if you are leaving wine or water, for example, that you might want to refresh the glass daily.

    2. Oliver

      October 23, 2021 at 10:20 am

      If the offering is gone, there is an entity in your house. I would suggest leaving the offering (if it’s food or water) for 6-12 hours and then asking your deity or whoever you work with what they would like you to do with it afterwards (whether it’s eating/drinking it or returning it to the earth, or even throwing it away)

    3. violet

      November 18, 2021 at 4:54 pm

      wait 6-12 hours, if its food ask if you can eat it, if its drink like tea or coffee you can dispose it to nature since it has nice qualities for the soil

  3. Margaret

    July 27, 2021 at 5:37 pm

    My sister said a bird was following her and asked me to identify it. It was a Brown Jay. What could it mean??

    1. sophia

      September 6, 2021 at 9:06 pm

      signs are personal to everybody! a brown jay could mean one thing for a person, and a completely different thing for another. i would suggest divination and guidance! trial and error my friend <3

  4. Margaret

    July 27, 2021 at 5:35 pm

    I work with Freya, Cernunnos, and Sequana. My first 2 deities didn’t work out but I feel a stronger connection then with the previous two. Does anyone have any suggestions?

    1. Quinn Webster

      November 13, 2021 at 12:50 pm

      Cernunnos has been contacting me for a while through my dreams, what do u personally use on his altar. I want to make one for him but I don’t know where to start. 🙂

  5. Sage

    July 9, 2021 at 10:03 pm

    I’m new to deity work but I was getting callings from hades so I made an offering and I do daily meditations and tarot readings with him but I am struggling to find a way to know if it’s connecting us together or not. I feel safe with hades and I light a candle when I meditate and do my readings that’s specifically devoted to him but I’m getting nothing through any of the clairs. Does anyone have any input or suggestions because that would really help!!

    1. anonymous

      September 12, 2021 at 7:22 pm

      listen to your thoughts. It can be hard to identify and differentiate between yours and Hades’. Just keep trying. If it feels like his thoughts, it is.

  6. Doreen

    January 9, 2021 at 12:03 pm

    I worked with Saint Expedite twice now and he did not come through with what I asked him and it was a crisis. I did gave him roses and his cake with pennies but was very sad because I did every thing correct. I dont know why ?

  7. Nat

    December 12, 2020 at 9:14 am

    I havent done much research as of yet, i’ve only looked into the basics of the roman and greek pantheons, largely because my family is from Italy and I felt they were the most connected to me of the pantheons, despite being what i consider the most well known and most commonly worked with. My grandfather passed very recently and this kind of touch with spirituality has led me here to begin practicing, and something people mentioned alot to me was this olive tree that my grandfather apparently LOVED, which I immediately note is a symbol of Minerva. Additionally, I’ve always felt some sort of draw towards snakes and serpents, which I know can be tied to many deities but do also tie to Minerva. I’m not quite sure if this is a calling or not, but I do feel compelled to attempt to create a relationship with her in some way. Does anyone have any suggestions or other deities from other pantheons they suggest I look into? I am drawn to lunar magic, tend towards the element of water but I am an earth sign (Taurus) and I work with plants a ton. I am an artist by trade and I’d venture to say im not a bad creator in general. Thank you for any advice!

    1. Nat

      December 12, 2020 at 9:15 am

      I inherited many plants from my grandfather, many of which were baby lemon trees, if that may be a sign of any sort

  8. Anonymous

    July 22, 2020 at 5:51 am

    I find ladybugs everywhere. They just show up wherever I go. I want to work with Greek gods and goddesses but I feel like the Norse goddess Freya is calling to me. Can I work with both Norse gods and goddesses and Greek gods and goddesses??

    1. tootsie

      July 28, 2020 at 12:43 pm

      Some traditionalists suggest only working with one pantheon, but others agree that working with some Greek and some Norse is just fine. I would work with whoever is calling to you, follow your heart!

    2. Poplar

      August 3, 2020 at 6:21 am

      absolutely!

    3. Preston

      November 16, 2020 at 6:30 pm

      Yes, you can! Many pagans, such as myself, work with gods from different Pantheons. I personally work with Greek, Egyptian, and Norse gods.

  9. Kimber

    June 17, 2020 at 3:29 pm

    Is there any specific website that’s best for researching the god/goddess that you want to work with?

  10. Zar.

    June 7, 2020 at 8:35 am

    “Worshipping” a deity can be an empowering and liberating experience however if an individual’s core self desires it. Just like in a human relationship where a consensual power exchange is as gratifying (if not more) for the submissive partner. Surrender can be the gateway to spiritual bliss!

  11. Olivia Holz

    March 21, 2020 at 3:52 pm

    How do I know if my deities are calling out to me? I’ve been practicing the craft for a few years now but only recently have I felt like someone or something and been calling out to me. I’m not a very observant person when it comes to subtle signs, so I honestly have no idea where to begin! All I know is that I must have angered someone, because lately I haven’t been my creative and wild self. Do you have any tips?

    1. Wolfielove18

      June 5, 2020 at 5:41 pm

      Some signs of a god or goddess could be anger or lack of creativity depending on which god is trying to contact you. So look up gods that show your symptoms as a sign that they are there, that or someone must’ve cursed you. It’s easy to curse someone with any ill intent even if it’s just them talking to themselves to make themselves feel better. Try looking for signs in your dream, meditate, and try to constantly talk to them in person or in your head. When you do your 3rd eye will keep opening till you can directly communicate with them. I did this unknowingly and I personally met them in my dream once my 3rd eye opened enough so now I know one of my gods who’ve been there for me. Good luck on your journey.

  12. Wendy Dixon

    December 19, 2019 at 10:10 pm

    Recently I’ve been seeing signs in numbers ie. the time on my phone. The very first time it was 11:11. Then every time after that it was 1:11. It would be every few days this would occur. Then, I recently did a full moon ritual…this last very powerful one that came in on December 12 at 12:12. However, I was unable to perform the ritual until Friday night the 13th. Yet hours later, I looked at my clock and it read 12:12. These signs did not start occurring until I began my first ritual starting with the new moon this last November, and then suddenly I began seeing these numbers. Am I correct in believing the Universe is telling me I’m on the right path and they acknowledge me? Is there a specific God or Goddess behind these particular signs? I’m very much a newbie to the craft and would love to know that I’m doing something right. Thank you for your time. Blessed Be.

    1. G

      March 15, 2020 at 6:58 pm

      These are “angel numbers” google their meanings! 🙂

    2. Klaudia

      January 6, 2021 at 1:59 pm

      it sounds like a signs from your spiritual guides or like a syndromes of spiritual awakening, read about it more and enjoy, its good sign for you, bless.

  13. delana robison

    June 15, 2019 at 2:47 pm

    i have black birds that follow me around r those my gods

    1. admin

      June 17, 2019 at 3:10 pm

      Often the animals are messengers from gods. Black birds could be related to the Morrigan or Odin.

    2. Margaret

      October 15, 2021 at 11:14 pm

      Could be the Morrigan or Lilith. Many different goddesses have a blackbird to symbolize, shapeshift, etc them so do your research!

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  16. Trinity Dean

    February 1, 2019 at 2:52 am

    What about circe? is she was to send reoccurring signs what might they be?

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